Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.