lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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