The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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