I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
