I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
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I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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