She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize