I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
