At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize