he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
