And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
3pm strippers are depressing
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
