Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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