I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Randomize