I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
