it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
