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Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
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