Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
