Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
