bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize