I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
not ubering you a puppy
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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