Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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