I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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