He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
