Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize