U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
