Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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