How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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