There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
