But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Randomize
