yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
