i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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