I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
