Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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