I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
