If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
