id be glad to
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
