I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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