so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
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