I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
