so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
