its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize