i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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