I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
my poor anus
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize