you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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