Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
