I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
