i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
