Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
