why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
