she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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