"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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